Hurt Squirrels

Memorial Haiku

Frank Zappa Memorial Haiku
Frank Zappa, you god.
Because of you, I never
Will eat yellow snow.

George Peppard Memorial Haiku
Chomp on a cigar
And sneer "I love it when a
Plan comes together."

Cab Calloway Memorial Haiku
Minnie the Moocher
A mission from God

C. R. Milne Memorial Haiku
Christopher Robin
He died bitter and angry
Hating that damn bear

Sonny Bono Memorial Haiku
Success in congress
But more famous as Cher's ex
Watch out for that tree

Henny Youngman Memorial Haiku
No more corny jokes
It is either him or me
So take his life, please

Dr. Spock Memorial Haiku
Live long and prosper
Says stoic first officer
Whoops, wrong one -- sorry

Shari Lewis Memorial Haiku
A sock puppeteer
Has shuffled off her woolen coil
Lamb chops for dinner

Dana Plato Memorial Haiku
Mr. Drummond sure
Was a terrible father
One down, two to go

Payne Stewart Memorial Haiku
Rough lie for Stewart
Worse yet, he didn't even
Replace his divot

Gene Rayburn Memorial Haiku
Old Gene is so dead -
How dead is he? - He's so dead
He's stiff as a...blank

Steve Reeves Memorial Haiku
Oily demi-god
Is so dead he can barely
Stay alive - bye, Herc

Billy Barty Memorial Haiku
Saturday mornings
Is when he was the biggest
In many weird roles

Carroll O'Connor Memorial Haiku
Off to join Edith
That lovable bigot gone
He has been stifled

Aaliyah Memorial Haiku
Bald Deltan hottie
And Decker were absorbed by
V'ger -- whoops! Wrong one!
John Candy Memorial Haiku
Goodbye John Candy
He played Buck, the uncle of
Macauley Culkin

Jackie O Memorial Haiku
Youngest first lady
Joins hubby in motorcade
Brains fall in her lap

Donald Pleasance Memorial Haiku
Donald is quite nice
Really fun to work with...uh
You know, he's...pleasant

Burgess Meredith Memorial Haiku
He taught me one thing:
Before the Apocalypse,
Get some spare glasses

Grampa Jones Memorial Haiku
Tormented, we ask
Hey Grampa, what's for supper?
No answer is found

Lloyd Bridges Memorial Haiku
By this time, his lungs
Are REALLY aching for air
Yet, no tank will help

Rob Pilatus Memorial Haiku
_____ ______ ______ ___ _____
____ ____ ___ ____ ___ ___ ___
_____ _____ _____ ____ ____

Roddy McDowell Memorial Haiku
Former child actor
Made his career by playing
A damn dirty ape

DeForest Kelly Memorial Haiku
Knew the end was near
He started looking worse than
In "The Deadly Years"

Hazel Frederick Memorial Haiku
Old dame watches as
Mary tosses her hat up
What you lookin' at?

Jim Varney Memorial Haiku
Hey Vern! It's the end
Of all those crappy movies
Ernest goes to Hell

Alec Guinness Memorial Haiku
My first exposure
To "geniune class" ended
In a empty robe

Douglas Adams Memorial Haiku
All of his obits
Contain the words "So long and
Thanks for all the fish"

John Lee Hooker Memorial Haiku
Got the John Lee is gone blues