Sample My Fist, Frodo!I went to the Bristol Renaissance Fair this weekend, dredging up some of the remaining vestiges of my old school geekiness. I have a love/hate relationship with the ren fest. There's so much about it that I just find corny, yet I can't bring myself to stop going. I have some strange attraction to ridiculously overpriced baubles hawked by community theater rejects. It must have been all those years of playing Dungeons & Dragons. I cannot look away, yet I must. It is, however, the place to go for plenty of zaftig bosoms spilling out of low-cut peasant dresses and chain mail bikinis.
8/28/2001 4:01 PM
8/28/2001 4:01 PM
That's one of things that bugs me. The "professionals" try and keep the costumes period, but all the patrons who dress up rarely do. I saw a Scottish Highlander, a la Braveheart. Well, okay, if you must. I saw some vikings. Er...a little too early, junior. I saw a samurai. Huh? And then there were the green fairy and the satyr. Suddenly, the chain mail bikinis aren't so goofy. That, of course, never made sense to me. What exactly is that protecting? "Her limbs have been severed and her entrails are spilling onto the ground, but hey, check out that rack!"
What is with these people dressed in their dashing knight and fair princess outfits? They're just like those folks who do that past life regression stuff. They always ending up being exciting, important people and never some faceless peon who died at age 34. Next year, I'm going dressed as a hapless yeoman.
And if they truly wanted to recreate those times of yore, they'd stop cleaning the place and get rid of the Port-A-Johns. The streets have a certain lack of shit in them and there's hardly any pestilence. Except maybe near the shepherds pie stand.
As we left, I noticed a few cars parked on the road, obviously hoping to save a few bucks on parking. I couldn't help thinking that if they're too cheap to lay out three bucks for parking, they're in for a hell of a shock when they get inside.
Oh, okay...I liked the mud show.