Hurt Squirrels
Mark Can Cook
7/31/2001 2:20 PM
I just got my new wok, scant minutes ago. Yep, it's the one from the infomercial; no other would do. When I opened the box, the wok itself was warm to the touch, undoubtedly from being in the back of the stuffy UPS truck on this delightful 92 day. In my rich fantasy life, however, it's because the UPS man used it to make his lunch. He probably got together with my mailman to read my Entertainment Weekly.

What's odd is that I don't like Chinese food all that much. I bought the wok for the many non-Chinese foods I prepare. I hate it when sloppy joes splatter out on to the stove while you're cooking then. "Not yet," I cry. "You're supposed to be sloppy when you get eaten, not when I cook you!" I suppose a big frying pan with tall sides would do, but what the hell. Maybe I'll even learn to make some actual Chinese dishes.

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