Hurt Squirrels
Sick Day
6/6/2001 11:40 AM
Blog. That's what this thing is called. At least, that's the hep Internet name for it. It's short for "weblog." I didn't come up with that term. It, however, is an accurate description as to how I feel today. Blog.

You know that feeling when you have a head cold, so you stay home from work or school and get all doped up on NyQuil and shuffle around the house like a zombie, all the while watching daytime television? That's blog. If it wasn't so annoying and painful and disgusting being sick, it would be comforting. Staying home sick is pretty much the same as it was when I was a kid and it's nice to know that some things stay happy and familiar no matter how old you get. Instead of watching "Dialing For Dollars With Howard and Rosemary" and reruns of "That Girl" I get "A Wedding Story" and reruns of "Beverly Hills 90210," but it's all pretty much the same.

Sure, I could spend my time watching a few DVDs from that growing stack or playing some video games, but it wouldn't feel like a true sick day. That's the kind of stuff you do when you call in sick but you really aren't. On true sick days you need to subject yourself to crappy daytime TV. It's part of the healing process. It helps disengage your brain from rational thought so your body can concentrate on fixing itself. Watching "The Hidden Fortress" will just prolong the sickness; you need that episode of "Alice" where they all break dance at the end to be cured.

Now, if you'll excuse me, "Wonder Woman" is on. Blog

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